Day 1!

Oh Dear Lord...If only I could go back to that first cigarette and throw it in a puddle before I put it to my lips. Who knew that the 1st taste of nicotine, so innocently inhaled, that made me cough like a mad woman, that made my lips burn and my stomach feel like it was going to heave my previously eaten chips onto my kid worn sneakers, would change my life so dramatically.

My name is Michelle and this is Day one of quitting smoking after a 14 yr addiction.

Granted this is not my first time quitting. This realistically is my 4th time throwing the butts down. But this time I swear to God will be my last time. It seems my brain just forgets after a while about this stupid day. This "DAY 1". The day where your entire life turns upside down as you wrestle with your brain begging it to stop telling you "Just forget about this quitting nonsense". This is the day you wish you had a light switch so you could just put yourself in a coma for a while, so that you wouldn't feel the shake of the withdraw and the ultimate PMS like symptoms that will rupture very soon.

YAY BRIGHT AND CHEERY NON-SMOKING FUTURE!!!..I have to keep telling myself this otherwise I start to go a little psycho.

This time I am doing quitting right:
1. I have nicotine inhalers. None of this chewing gum for nicotine bullshit. I'm coping out! I am going to trick myself today...bahahaha take that body...my brain is getting smarter this time!
2. I have mentos! That's right! The fresh maker
3. I have my sketch book, even though I am a fucking terrible drawer...I'm still picking up that pen. Screw you hands...you will be busy for the next couple of weeks.
4. I am conquering my brain by using this Blog. BOOO YEH..Screw you brain...bahahaha, I can't get a craving if I'm writing shit down.
5. I have copious amounts of gum...and I seriously mean copious amounts. I swear I could make a mountain out of chewed gum when I am done.
And thus...this time I will succeed! I will triumph over big tobacco and make it so it is easier to breathe again.
So what you can expect from this little blog of mine is simple...many "I need a fucking cigarette rants", also a lot of cool internet shit that I will steal from stumble, and a a lot of fucking swearing....because truly I am French at heart.

*muah*